Missing My Bloggers

GatorMan and I just returned from a "mini-break" to the mountains... which did not include (in the phrasology of those living in the mountains:) the "internets" (yes, plural). So the first thing I do when I walk in the door? Log on to the "internets" to get the updates on all of my fellow bloggers! I feel like I have been completely out-of-the-loop, and it is so good to be back in!

On the way to the mountains, I spoke with Intermediary's Husband again, and got the update on Juno and Ukulele. Everything looks fantastic, Ukulele is great, Juno is great.... and here's the best news: Juno is more positive about the adoption than she has ever been! Don't get me wrong, she's always been for it, but her attitude is taking a more "positive" turn. Think back to when you were 15 . . . . . I know I could barely decide what boy I liked more, much less make a decision that would impact so many lives all at once. I am hoping this positive attitude is the pre-adoption counseling she is going through.

House update: We may have one! We walked through a possibility on Wednesday right before we left and really liked it. Is it absolutely the 100% perfect house of our dreams? No. But we also realize that whatever house we get we will only be in for ~5 years or so. So.... this is a very good option for that time frame. GatorMan and I want to go through the house one more time before we sign any papers.

Overall, it's been a great week.... lots of relaxing, wine, fall leaves, cool air, and us-time. As much as I loved it all, I hope that it is the last chance we have for it before we become the family we desperately want to be!

One Step Closer... Two Steps Back

One step closer:
We got some good news today - we have a pediatrician!!! It's not the same doctor that we originally wanted (he was not taking new patients), but the nurse in his office helped us get another doctor from the same practice that comes highly recommended. So, one step closer to being official parents! We are slowly getting everything lined up for Ukulele.

Now, two steps back:
I told the husband of our intermediary that we secured a pediatrician today, and he stated "don't get your hopes up too high, I know it's hard, but don't get too excited." Um. WHAT? Is there something we need to know about? I am fairly certain that if anything was heading south with the adoption that we would be told about it. At least I really think we would. I know not to get too attached and excited - why the hell else would I be keeping this information to myself and not sharing it with my friends? Of course I know it could all go to the shitter in a heartbeat - but c'mon! Also, Juno was scheduled for another doctor appointment today, and husband of intermediary said he would call me and give me the update..... it's 9:00 p.m. right now.... no update yet.... Oh, if you are wondering why husband of intermediary is so involved all of a sudden, our actual intermediary had surgery last week and is still on bed rest from it. Anyway, it feels like we have just taken two steps back despite our huge accomplishment of getting a pediatrician. Oh well. Day by day.

Dinner with *Friends* - Part 2

Tonight we had dinner at my favorite mexican restaurant (and yes, margaritas included) with one of my very best friends who is visiting from Indiana while her husband finishes his out-processing with the military. My friend, H, and I went to college together and were in the same sorority. It is so good to have her here, even if it is only for a few days. I live about 18 hours from where I grew up, so any friendly face from the past is always welcome! Anyway, the point to this story is I am debating whether to talk to her about Ukulele or not. Odd to type this while she and her husband sit across from me in the living room! She has had at least two (that I know of) miscarriages in the last year and a half - one of them with twins. So I know she would be a sympathetic ear with the IF leg of my journey.... it's just that whole jinxing thing where Ukulele is concerned.

Oh, I'm hoping to have a positive update on the Realtor front tomorrow. Realtor and I came to an understanding a couple of days ago, and now he is back on the pedal and moving forward. He called today with a really good lead on a possible home for us. Keep your fingers crossed!

As for Dr. Needle - I go to him tomorrow for my third visit. Still too soon to see if any of this works (on us) or not.... but I'll keep you posted as it goes along.

Dinner with *Friends*

Last night GatorMan and I went out to dinner with a group of friends - two who were visiting from out-of-town. We all decided to meet for drinks beforehand so we could all catch up on each other's lives. FertileMyrtle from Need to Vent fame was also invited. FertileMyrtle is a very attractive petite woman who looks absolutely stunning pregnant. Anyway, as she walks in, our female out-of-town friend comments on how great she looks (and she did). FertileMyrtle responds - get ready - she responds:

"Oh no. I'm doing everything I can to cover it up."

She was talking about her pregnancy. I literally had to bite my tongue, and instead emitted a very sarcastic laugh. As much as I wanted to respond to her in the most sarcastic vile way I could, it was unfortunately not the place to do it. Argghhh! I know I'm bitter, but this is getting to be almost farcical. I wish I had a video camera each time one of these situations came up so you could all watch with me - in horror. Is pregnancy-brain that prevalent in some so that they lose all sense of couthness?

Doctors and Daycare

Doctors:
There are a handful of highly recommended pediatricians in my town, and a plethora of "avoid-at-all-costs" pediatricians. I've got to line up a pediatrician for Ukulele so that doctor can be present immediately after the delivery. I've tried to contact the most recommended one, and here is a crude transcript (based on my recollection) of the conversation:

Dr. Office: Good morning, Dr.'s Office.
Me: Good morning. I've got a peculiar situation. I am expecting to adopt a baby in January, and Dr. has come highly recommended. Will he be accepting new patients at that time?
Dr. Office: Well, I'm not sure. Dr. is the one that makes that decision. Let me get some information from you and I will pass it on to him for him to call you. Hold on, let me get to that screen.... Okay. When is the due date?
Me: January ___. At least that is what I have been told.
Dr. Office: Do you know the OB/GYN?
Me: No, it is a closed adoption.
Dr. Office: Okay, um... (I hear her hitting keys on the computer and mumbling under her breath "okay, can't ask that one.... nope.... nope....")
Me: I can tell you who referred me.
Dr. Office: Great, let's do that.

I still have not heard from Dr. Office. I was so disappointed by that particular conversational exchange that I have not had the strength to go through it again. I cannot answer the particulars that they are going to want to know. All I can do is tell them that I will call them when the baby is born. How am I supposed to get a doctor prior to that time?


Daycare:
In the town where I live, it is very difficult to get good daycare. Most parents put their not-yet-born child on a waiting list for the "good" places. For example, a friend of mine started looking at daycare facilities when she was three months pregnant. Her son is now 9 months old, and he's still on the waiting list. That kind of nonsense makes it almost impossible for someone in my situation to get good daycare prior to pre-school. (And school, by the way, is a whole lotta similar.) Am I supposed to go to the daycare facilities that we are interested in and say "Hi, I'm GreenEggsNHam. My husband and I are adopting. We are not exactly sure when the baby will be born, or if the birthmother will change her mind. So, just as a precaution, can we please have a spot on your list just in case?" How the hell are we supposed to handle all this? Are we required to keep calling the daycare facilities moving our "entrance" date back and back until we adopt? With someone who gives birth, they have a fairly certain idea of when the baby will arrive, and therefore, when daycare will be needed. GatorMan and I are lucky that we know the due date for Ukulele, but there is no guarantee that it is all going to happen in accordance with "our" plan.


I would really appreciate any advice if any of you have had to maneuver through similar situations.

I DID IT I DID IT I DID IT!

Remember how I said I was going to try acupuncture? Well I did today! Was I nervous? Sure. But it was great! Very relaxing, despite the needles in my head, abdomen, arms, knees, ankles, feet, and calves. Sounds horrendous, and I am sure I resembled the guy from "Hellraiser" -- but I wouldn't know what I looked like because I did not look anywhere else but the ceiling. I'm not that brave. I laid there for 25 minutes while the needles did their needling thing. I even dozed off a couple of times.

Yes, GatorMan and I are still adopting Ukulele in January, but we have this extra flex-spending money to deplete before December 31... and since Dr. RE refuses to help us anymore, we decided to try Dr. Needle. Dr. Needle thinks he'll be able to help with my FSH levels, and also get my period on a more regular course of action. He also thinks he'll be able to help GatorMan with his levels, so we'll see what happens. I guess that means I will have to start tracking my AF arrival dates so I can see if it is working or not. I have not tracked that bit of monthly fun for quite some time.... she just shows up when she shows up. The other benefit of Dr. Needle? An attempt at reversing the trend of my needing to buy larger pants. Although, eating at my favorite mexican restaurant tonight probably didn't help much...... or those margaritas.....

Anonymously trying.

First of all, I would like to thank GatorMan for putting a graphic in my title bar. I rather like it, and am very grateful that he understands the whole html thing because I surely don't.

Question for my fellow bloggers: How many of you do this anonymously? Meaning most of your family and friends do not know that you have a blog? Right now, very few people in my immediate circle know of my nefarious blogging activities. Probably good since I tend to "vent" about some of them. Makes me feel kind of sneaky - and I rather like it.

I just want to say that I have really enjoyed getting to know many of you - although it feels very voyeuristic at times as I am not a "comment poster." But I am very pleased that people are reading my blog (thanks, Stirrup Queen of Lost and Found Connections for exposing my little corner to the blogging world - I love it!).

This particular post is also an attempt to learn how to use blogger. So, I am making a valiant attempt at doing links and pictures.

And for pictures, here is my dog, Matthew. He's a low-rider beagle-basset. And quite adorable.

And so she doesn't feel left out and then puke in my shoes while I sleep, here is Molly, the mean-ole-kitty-cat. Fuzzy, pretty, and mad at the world most of the time. It could be the whole brother-is-a-dog thing. Not really sure. She's just mad. Always.

I suppose that is enough posting of non-anonymous pictures. Not sure how long I will continue this little "you-don't-know-me" charade of mine -- probably until the Ukulele arrives. Until then, I'll remain anonymous while we Wait for our Ukulele.