"I can cry if I want to....."

Last night I talked to my mother - Ukulele's grandmother - and we discussed what was going on with the whole adoption process. Grandma GreenEggsNHam has been asking what we are going to name our little Ukulele, and I haven't told her yet. I said it was going to be a surprise. GatorMan was sitting next to me on the couch when the discussion with Grandma was occurring. I looked over at him and mouthed "do your parents know the name?" He just looks at me and nods! So I ask Grandma if she really wants to know the name we picked, and she says "yes." So I tell her. I only get the first name out and there is silence on the other end. Then I hear her sobbing. So I start crying. Then I look over at GatorMan and his eyes are watery. After she and I calm down, I tell her the middle name.... more crying. We are giving the Ukulele my mother's name as a first name, and her middle name after GatorMan's mother. Sorry, cannot share the name right now... I don't want to jinx anything.

Speaking of jinxing, is it wrong that we have not bought one single thing for Ukulele yet? I mean no bottles, clothes, diapers, zilch. Nada. I'm even afraid to look at stuff in the store for fear that I will get too attached. I know this is the "protective" stance, but is it overboard? The thing is, is that I do not want any of that stuff in the house in case something does not work out the way we anticipate. But then on the other side of it, I know we should keep a positive attitude about the whole thing - which would include preparations. Ugh. Has anyone read "The Secret"? Damn you, "The Secret"! I'm afraid to be hesitant and protective of my feelings, but I know that I should be positive and expect the best to happen.

Still nothing new on the Ukulele front. Just (im)patiently waiting for her arrival. With positive thoughts.