. . . . . not only was Ukulele's adoption finalized this morning,
we closed on our "nused" house this afternoon.
Whew, what a day!
Monday, February 23, 2009
February 23, 2009
It's official:
Ukulele's adoption is final!
We became a "Forever Family" at 9:00 a.m. this morning!!!!
Ukulele's adoption is final!
We became a "Forever Family" at 9:00 a.m. this morning!!!!
Thursday, February 19, 2009
BC.BS = Discriminators?
Approximately two weeks ago I received in the mail a flyer from my insurance company (blue.cross blue.shield). The flyer advertised a program titled "Future Moms". Some of the perks of this program included prenatal counseling, on-call prenatal nurses, a handy write-on wipe-off board for babysitters, and an immunization record. When I received the flyer, I called the number and explained I did not need the prenatal counseling, nor would I be utilizing the on-call prenatal nurses. I indicated that I just adopted a baby, and I would very much like the write-on wipe-off board and the immunization record. The very nice lady said she understood and took my information down and indicated she would pass it along to the appropriate person to see if they would send the items.
I never heard back.
And then about a week ago I received a call from blue.cross. The nice woman on the phone was calling to tell me about their great program titled "Future Moms". I cut her off and explained - nicely (and not sarcastically like normal) - that I had already spoken with someone, and I had requested a couple of the items. I explained why I would not need the more "expensive" items they were offering. She said she'd talk to the appropriate person and get back with me. She called me back about 30 minutes later.
I was denied.
I was denied a write-on wipe-off board and immunization record because I could not get pregnant, and this program is designed for pregnant women. I told the woman - not so nicely this time - that I never wanted another phone call from them about this again. And then I hung up on her.
That evening I began composing (in my head) the letter that would be written to blue.cross. And how I would copy it to the insurance commissioner for my state, every adoption media contact I could find, and the human resource manager for my very large employer. The letter - as I was writing it in my head - addressed how I was being discriminated against. It also talked about how much money I would save them because I could NOT get pregnant. And that if they just looked at my record, they would in fact see, rather quickly, that I have been diagnosed INFERTILE, and they should be more careful in their mass mailings. (They sure has hell immediately saw the infertily diagnosis when my RE put it in my billing record - so it's not like they did not know.) The writing of this letter kept me up all night.
The next day I tried to find the information regarding this program online. Could not find a darned thing. Zip. I was not sure I even had the correct name for the program. How would I address the program and its problems if I could not even correctly name it? So, this glitch put the letter writing on hold for a few days.
Guess what arrived in the mail yesterday, in an unmarked envelope, and no accompanying letter?
A write-on wipe-off board and immunization record.
I never heard back.
And then about a week ago I received a call from blue.cross. The nice woman on the phone was calling to tell me about their great program titled "Future Moms". I cut her off and explained - nicely (and not sarcastically like normal) - that I had already spoken with someone, and I had requested a couple of the items. I explained why I would not need the more "expensive" items they were offering. She said she'd talk to the appropriate person and get back with me. She called me back about 30 minutes later.
I was denied.
I was denied a write-on wipe-off board and immunization record because I could not get pregnant, and this program is designed for pregnant women. I told the woman - not so nicely this time - that I never wanted another phone call from them about this again. And then I hung up on her.
That evening I began composing (in my head) the letter that would be written to blue.cross. And how I would copy it to the insurance commissioner for my state, every adoption media contact I could find, and the human resource manager for my very large employer. The letter - as I was writing it in my head - addressed how I was being discriminated against. It also talked about how much money I would save them because I could NOT get pregnant. And that if they just looked at my record, they would in fact see, rather quickly, that I have been diagnosed INFERTILE, and they should be more careful in their mass mailings. (They sure has hell immediately saw the infertily diagnosis when my RE put it in my billing record - so it's not like they did not know.) The writing of this letter kept me up all night.
The next day I tried to find the information regarding this program online. Could not find a darned thing. Zip. I was not sure I even had the correct name for the program. How would I address the program and its problems if I could not even correctly name it? So, this glitch put the letter writing on hold for a few days.
Guess what arrived in the mail yesterday, in an unmarked envelope, and no accompanying letter?
A write-on wipe-off board and immunization record.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009
Busy Week!
We have a busy busy seven days ahead of us:
Today: Ukulele had her two month check-up.... with shots. I cannot believe how much she has grown since her January 2 appointment! (For stats and progress pictures, click here for information on accessing my photo blog.)
Tomorrow: Court-ordered homestudy for Ukulele's adoption.
Monday morning: Ukulele's Adoption Finalization!
Monday afternoon: Tentative closing on our nused (used, but new to us) house.
Whew.
Today: Ukulele had her two month check-up.... with shots. I cannot believe how much she has grown since her January 2 appointment! (For stats and progress pictures, click here for information on accessing my photo blog.)
Tomorrow: Court-ordered homestudy for Ukulele's adoption.
Monday morning: Ukulele's Adoption Finalization!
Monday afternoon: Tentative closing on our nused (used, but new to us) house.
Whew.
Tuesday, February 10, 2009
Random Updates
1. Daycare
Yay - we got in to the most sought-after daycare... woo!!! And might I add - it is much to the chagrin of FertileMyrtle?? Ukulele starts on March 30 - and I go back to work on April 6. I figured I would need a good week to get used to her being gone.
2. Pediatrician
We head back for our 2 month visit next Tuesday. Ukulele will be getting a plethora of shots, and I am not looking forward to it. But, I really really like the pediatrician we have and trust him immensely. I'm sure he'll put me at ease before he starts jabbing my baby with needles.
3. House
We were tentatively schedule to close this coming Friday - the 13th. It has now been moved to next week sometime because the appraisal has not been done. On one hand I'm glad we are not closing on Friday the 13th..... seems like kind of a bad omen. On the other hand, I am so ready to get out of this closet-sized townhome and move on and get to decorating! Also, might I add, I am looking forward to Ukulele having her own room instead of sleeping two feet away from me. I love the child dearly, but every time I hear a "strange" breath come out of her, I am jumping out of the bed to look at her. I think - or at least hope - that after a few nights in her own room I'll start sleeping a little bit better.
4. Weight
Okay, this is not really much of an update, but an added bonus of having a newborn. I have already dropped a complete size because I forget to eat. When Ukulele eats every three hours, and I only have about an hour in between feedings to get stuff done, I forget. I'll probably blow up like a balloon once I get back to work, but for now I am enjoying wearing jeans I have not had on in over a year!
5. Hate Mail to the Hospital
Yes, they are going to receive the letter. I have decided to send it AFTER the finalization of Ukulele's adoption (to be discussed below). From the last time I addressed this issue, I have found out more egregious acts that the hospital committed. The most egregious is the fact that Ukulele - and her FirstMom - were discharged from the hospital without a birth certificate being done. FirstMom had to go back to the hospital to fill out all the paperwork about two weeks after her discharge. When she got there, the hospital politely informed her that they went ahead and did it a couple of days beforehand. Yeah, real smooth. Another fantastic thing the hospital has done? They have lost the test results for Ukulele's initial bloodwork. I cannot recall the name of the test, but it's done immediately after birth. Apparently the results are mailed to the birthmother's house... but in our case they were supposed to be mailed to my attorney's house. Our attorney never received them. FirstMom never received them. Pediatrician never received them. I have not received them. No one seems to know where they are. Hopefully there was not anything in there that needs attention. This letter, incidentally, is being sent not only to the Board of Directors for the hospital, but also to the accreditation board.
6. Finalization Hearing
Ukulele's Finalization Hearing is set for February 23. Yippee!!!! I'm a little concerned, however, because the homestudy has not been completed yet. We have gotten all of our paperwork to the "adoption consultant" (that's what she calls herself), but we have not heard from her yet in regards to when she wants to come visit us. I'm hoping she comes this week so she can get that darned report written and to the court.
Okay, updates done.
Yay - we got in to the most sought-after daycare... woo!!! And might I add - it is much to the chagrin of FertileMyrtle?? Ukulele starts on March 30 - and I go back to work on April 6. I figured I would need a good week to get used to her being gone.
2. Pediatrician
We head back for our 2 month visit next Tuesday. Ukulele will be getting a plethora of shots, and I am not looking forward to it. But, I really really like the pediatrician we have and trust him immensely. I'm sure he'll put me at ease before he starts jabbing my baby with needles.
3. House
We were tentatively schedule to close this coming Friday - the 13th. It has now been moved to next week sometime because the appraisal has not been done. On one hand I'm glad we are not closing on Friday the 13th..... seems like kind of a bad omen. On the other hand, I am so ready to get out of this closet-sized townhome and move on and get to decorating! Also, might I add, I am looking forward to Ukulele having her own room instead of sleeping two feet away from me. I love the child dearly, but every time I hear a "strange" breath come out of her, I am jumping out of the bed to look at her. I think - or at least hope - that after a few nights in her own room I'll start sleeping a little bit better.
4. Weight
Okay, this is not really much of an update, but an added bonus of having a newborn. I have already dropped a complete size because I forget to eat. When Ukulele eats every three hours, and I only have about an hour in between feedings to get stuff done, I forget. I'll probably blow up like a balloon once I get back to work, but for now I am enjoying wearing jeans I have not had on in over a year!
5. Hate Mail to the Hospital
Yes, they are going to receive the letter. I have decided to send it AFTER the finalization of Ukulele's adoption (to be discussed below). From the last time I addressed this issue, I have found out more egregious acts that the hospital committed. The most egregious is the fact that Ukulele - and her FirstMom - were discharged from the hospital without a birth certificate being done. FirstMom had to go back to the hospital to fill out all the paperwork about two weeks after her discharge. When she got there, the hospital politely informed her that they went ahead and did it a couple of days beforehand. Yeah, real smooth. Another fantastic thing the hospital has done? They have lost the test results for Ukulele's initial bloodwork. I cannot recall the name of the test, but it's done immediately after birth. Apparently the results are mailed to the birthmother's house... but in our case they were supposed to be mailed to my attorney's house. Our attorney never received them. FirstMom never received them. Pediatrician never received them. I have not received them. No one seems to know where they are. Hopefully there was not anything in there that needs attention. This letter, incidentally, is being sent not only to the Board of Directors for the hospital, but also to the accreditation board.
6. Finalization Hearing
Ukulele's Finalization Hearing is set for February 23. Yippee!!!! I'm a little concerned, however, because the homestudy has not been completed yet. We have gotten all of our paperwork to the "adoption consultant" (that's what she calls herself), but we have not heard from her yet in regards to when she wants to come visit us. I'm hoping she comes this week so she can get that darned report written and to the court.
Okay, updates done.
Saturday, February 7, 2009
We Are Well-Adjusted....
The whole family is now well-adjusted! Well, according the chiropractor.... We all went to the chiro on Friday. It started with just me, it seems holding Ukulele puts quite the "crick" in my neck. While I was there, I asked the doc if he did infant adjustments, and he did! He's done adjustments on infants who were only 1 day old. I explained the problems Ukulele was having, he checked her out, made a couple of adjustments, and we were on our way. GatorMan ended up going to see him a couple of hours later.
Now I know there are people out there who are fans of chiropractic care, and those who are not. I grew up in the Quad Cities where Palmer College of Chiropractic is located. My grandmother owned a large victorian home which was divided into apartments - and she would only accept Palmer students as tenants. Growing up in that environment exposed me to chiropractic care at a very young age. I have always found that it relieved most pains I have experienced. A friend a few days ago mentioned that she had taken her babies to her chiro for similar issues Ukulele was experiencing, and thought that an adjustment may work for Ukulele.
Ukulele was experiencing reflux, with the lovely addition of painful bowel movements. Since her adjustment yesterday, her "upchucking" has decreased significantly, and she hasn't shown any pain during a bowel movement. My neck doesn't hurt anymore, and GatorMan feels great.
We are a well-adjusted family! Now we just have to convince that social worker during our homestudy.......
Now I know there are people out there who are fans of chiropractic care, and those who are not. I grew up in the Quad Cities where Palmer College of Chiropractic is located. My grandmother owned a large victorian home which was divided into apartments - and she would only accept Palmer students as tenants. Growing up in that environment exposed me to chiropractic care at a very young age. I have always found that it relieved most pains I have experienced. A friend a few days ago mentioned that she had taken her babies to her chiro for similar issues Ukulele was experiencing, and thought that an adjustment may work for Ukulele.
Ukulele was experiencing reflux, with the lovely addition of painful bowel movements. Since her adjustment yesterday, her "upchucking" has decreased significantly, and she hasn't shown any pain during a bowel movement. My neck doesn't hurt anymore, and GatorMan feels great.
We are a well-adjusted family! Now we just have to convince that social worker during our homestudy.......
Monday, February 2, 2009
It Doesn't Hurt as Bad.... Seriously
I have a friend that got pregnant very easily. Don't we all have those friends? Well this particular friend of mine is one of those know-it-alls. You say something about a topic - ANY topic - and she knows more about it. Well, her little boy just turned one in December. He was only a few months old when GatorMan and I went through our one and only IUI. While I was all jacked up on hormones and feeling all the pregnancy signs in my two week wait, she told GatorMan that there was no way I could be feeling those things because no one does. Well - bottom line is that SHE didn't feel signs in her two week wait, so therefore, no one else can either. At the time, we didn't realize that those two weeks of "pregnancy feelings" were the only ones we would ever experience.
Shortly thereafter, Dr. RE cut us off. Needless to say, her words hurt me deeply. And not only did they hurt me, they hurt GatorMan, so that made her comments worse. After months (yes, plural), I finally addressed the situation with her. She apologized, genuinely, and acknowledged her propensity for spouting out things without thinking.
This friend and two others threw us a baby shower a couple of weekends ago. A very nice, very fun, baby shower. I didn't notice that she did not drink mimosas with the rest of us.
Yes, you KNOW where this is going.
She called the other day with her great news..... she's pregnant again. I asked if they had been trying, or did this just "happen." She said they'd been trying for seven months and she was getting so frustrated. I think she forgot who she was talking to. Then she mentioned how the first trimester is the worst. Again - audience acknowledgment is not her strong suit.
After hearing her news - did it sting? A little. Am I jealous? A tiny bit. Does it hurt as bad as it used to? Not at all. In fact, I am really happy for her, and was not as bothered by her thoughtless comments as I would have normally been.
Thank you, Little Miss Ukulele. You are making me a better person with every day that goes by.
Shortly thereafter, Dr. RE cut us off. Needless to say, her words hurt me deeply. And not only did they hurt me, they hurt GatorMan, so that made her comments worse. After months (yes, plural), I finally addressed the situation with her. She apologized, genuinely, and acknowledged her propensity for spouting out things without thinking.
This friend and two others threw us a baby shower a couple of weekends ago. A very nice, very fun, baby shower. I didn't notice that she did not drink mimosas with the rest of us.
Yes, you KNOW where this is going.
She called the other day with her great news..... she's pregnant again. I asked if they had been trying, or did this just "happen." She said they'd been trying for seven months and she was getting so frustrated. I think she forgot who she was talking to. Then she mentioned how the first trimester is the worst. Again - audience acknowledgment is not her strong suit.
After hearing her news - did it sting? A little. Am I jealous? A tiny bit. Does it hurt as bad as it used to? Not at all. In fact, I am really happy for her, and was not as bothered by her thoughtless comments as I would have normally been.
Thank you, Little Miss Ukulele. You are making me a better person with every day that goes by.
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